I grew up in an upper middle class family. I've never had a job - not even a pseudo one like babysitting. I've never had to worry about the money for my expenses not being there. I've also never really been given money (with the exception of gifts). It was more so, "I need XYZ" and then my parents would usually give me the money for it. Ever since I entered high school, my father was against paying for things directly... he liked to give me the actual money and then have me pay for it (ex: my cell phone bill... he would put the money in my account and then I would pay for it through my account). Apparently this was his way of teaching me how to use money.
With my SD, this was the first time that I had actually received money that relatively served no purpose. It was just... there, for me to do whatever I wanted with it. It didn't even really feel like "real money" (if this makes any sense) because I didn't feel like I had worked for it.
Naturally, my financial perspective quickly became skewed. I didn't think about prices or money or anything at all. It was a complete nonissue. I was smart enough to save a decent amount, but even now I'm still confused as to where some of the money went... okay, I know - lots and lots of small random things that added up over time.
When I went shopping, I never looked at tags. I would pick up the tab at restaurants and bars without even thinking twice. If someone couldn't do XYZ because they were trying to save money, I'd go ahead and tell him/her it was on me. I had complete and absolute financial freedom because the money I was getting weekly was 100% mine. I did not have to be accountable for it and thus, I did whatever the hell I wanted with it.
Okay, I know I made that sound pretty awesome. It was and even now, since I saved some, I still have a great deal of financial freedom, especially in comparison to many of my peers. However, I was acting like my generous circumstance would never end - as if the money would be a consistent trait of my life. Obviously, since I ended it with my SD, it wasn't.
I learned that it is important to think about the future financially when in an arrangement. He could end it any day and vice versa. Responsibility with money is an invaluable trait.
1. Save, save, SAVE. This is crucial if you want to maintain a certain lifestyle even when you don't have a SD. My grooming habits add up - products, gym membership, spas & salons, etc. I make sure that I always have enough money to cover these extra necessities.
2. Invest in things that will pay off in the future; invest in yourself. Whether it's finding an Italian language tutor or buying a classic black dress and heels for future SD meetings and dates, it's never a bad decision to spend money on something that will make you a more interesting and attractive individual, especially in regards to the sugar world.
3. Don't lease anything. I never did this, but I have heard stories of girls going out and leasing a brand new Porsche because they were getting a nice allowance and then the relationship going south.
4. Keep track of where the money is going. Or else you'll end up like my friend who is slightly confused as to where the 15k her past SD gave her went.
5. Be discreet about the money. I half-assed this tip... while I never mentioned the money to anyone except a very close friend, my spending habits did make some (nosy) people toss a few questions my way. My responses were always vague and ambiguous so they probably just chalked it up to me being a spoiled brat, but still - avoid these situations if you can.
6. Be well-informed about banks and their rules. You DON'T want little red flags going up on your account. I bypassed any suspicions by keeping most of the money in cash (except what I saved), but this also led to me having ridiculous spending habits. For some reason, while my conscious won't let me touch the money in my savings account, it thinks everything in my purse is fair game.
7. Think before buying. I didn't and I wasted a lot of money. Don't do this.
